I know absolutely nothing about coffee. I know that dark roast coffees exist, and therefore light roasts, and that there is caffeinated and decaf, and half-caf but I don’t think that’s anything new but simply a combination of the two. There’s also something called a macchiato which may or may not have chocolate in it, and a latte and cappuccino but I couldn’t tell you what the difference is between the two unless I had just Googled it since I last Googled it a month ago. I like coffee ice cream a lot, and tiramisu is pretty great; there’s some coffee poured onto that. Also there’s espresso. And Espwesso.
But that’s it.
Except.
 
I discovered a drink a few summers ago in a local coffee shop that changed my coffee life forever, in two ways:
1.) I can actually identify a type of coffee drink accurately and consistently
2.) I can now drink something other than black coffee, so I can actually order something at those casual coffee shop socials
 
from http://www.flickr.com/photos/61021997@N06/5637765569/

This is where I found The Coffee.

What is it? It’s called a Breve (Caffè Breve). I don’t actually know how readily these exist and I don’t go to Pi ever (I’d obviously have no idea of what to order) so I don’t know if they have it, but I don’t think they do. Anyways, it is quite simple.

For those of you that know what coffee is: An espresso-based drink that’s made like a cappuccino, but with half and half instead of milk.

For those of you like me:

Breve Composish

The video that I watched used 16 oz. of half-and-half total.
Basically it’s half and half that tastes like coffee.
Basically, a drink can’t get any better.*

But it can get worse, if you use half and half that looks as dubious as this.

 
Since I know nothing about the coffee serving establishments at Wesleyan, and making a “breve” with black coffee and half and half in Usdan isn’t quite the same, will they make it for me? Is that something they do? Espwesso perhaps? I don’t want to demand they make me a drink that they don’t serve, presuming that they’re like Starbucks.** But I would be super excited to have a Breve made with Ronnybrook half and half. It’s delicious. I drink it on its own already.

Ronnybrook!!

I love this a lot.

 
Additionally, thanks to the Internet, I just discovered that:
1.) ** If you order a “Breve Latte” at Starbucks, they should be able to make it for you. (Try one!)
2.) *There’s a thing called a Mocha Breve, which adds in an ounce of chocolate. I will really need to try that. It sounds like The Ultimate Coffee Drink.

Mocha Breve

Time to find me one of these.


 
What is your coffee of choice?